Dulzura was largely destroyed during the Harris Fire that took out hundreds of thousands of acres in Southern California this past fall. Firestorms like that are rarely so intense and the areas destroyed in California are larger than many cities; hundreds are still without homes.
Over the last four years I've made at least 6 trips up the mountain to spend time with the monks at Madre Grande Monastery. After visiting a dozen major spiritual communities across America I found one that felt most like home, a Theosophical space for esoterics who enjoy the arcane mysteries and wisdom traditions from around the world. Madre reaches out to their community, assisting other fire victims while they rebuild their lives.
Their archives and library of letters was ravaged by fire....metal files now hold nothing but ashes and dust. A nearby prayer wheel sits nearly untouched while burn scars can be seen in the wet winter earth. They lost almost all residences and workspaces for their seven monks and student/visitors but none of the major spiritual centers were touched....the sweat lodge area, special trees and altars were all alive. The cats all survived in the one remaining building that now houses the meditation room, office, residences, kitchen, dining room, library and bathroom for the monks.
In December we took two trips to Dulzura to assist with fire cleanup efforts. The monks were overwhelmed with the amount of work to do after the fires and were very appreciative of community support, from frequent visitors as well as from those who may have never been there before. For the month prior to our arrival the monks had to shower in a nearby town, 30 minutes away by car, and had no running water or phone on site.
We took a small team from Amoration with Burners without Borders to take on basic plumbing, electrical and welding needs for the community. The Amoration team took on a few basics: electrical boxes, plumbing in the remaining bathroom on site, welding the gate to keep the land safe. Madre Grande is in a remote but somewhat precarious location, just a few miles from the border with Mexico there are often border patrol and other people driving the road through the property. In the months after the fires there were also issues with locals and lots of utility trucks around, along with the county support staff that hauled out 40 containers and truckloads of burnt ruins away from Dulzura.
The future is uncertain for Madre Grande; they have a long road ahead and many decisions to make for their best possible future. Moving and rebuilding would be a great challenge but they may no longer be able to fulfill their mission in their current state on this property. As they assess the cost of maintaining a spiritual retreat and monastery we look to what we can do as individuals to support these spaces with our time, talent and care. AMO friends have donated awesome gifts such as new hoses and faucets, showerheads and sprayers.
Inside the old school bus I was caught by the beauty of the melted glass, the thought of a fire so hot that it could encrust the rust and yet flow the windshield into a river of molten sand.
Words do not do this place justice.
What you see here now is gone.
Art, like the spirit, is a temporary collection of idea and expression in some public display of opportunity.
This place has given me so many opportunities, such a rich landscape to consider over the years. Many of my toughest struggles and greatest joys have been known in these fields, from my marriage to the handsomest husband to tears flowing in a hot sweat lodge as asthma and I work to have a parting of the ways. I am not yet detangled from this mess.
We feel so lucky to still have my home, my handsome husband, my friends Marta and Rob who joined us for the first journey and who took these amazing photos of Madre Grande to share with you. Tracey, Mario, John and our fellow monks have also become friends whose future feels closely tied to our own. Other friends have also stepped up in hopes that we can all support each other in our growth....we will see what this future holds for Madre and for all of us.
These places sometimes enter our hearts and do not let go.
I sometimes want to remember Madre and her fire the way it can be....sweet, fun and full of laughter, my wedding night, almond champagne by the case, hundreds of friends in full formalwear as our fire performer friends hit the stage. Madre Grande once hosted a regional Burning Man event known as Xara....please enjoy this video from our 2006 wedding to see the life that this place has known...and will hopefully know again soon.
As with anything in this world, take the time to explore for yourself.
All I can say is oops....I did it again. I'll continue to do it, and love it. This community, the greater community that Madre represents, means more to me than just about anything on this particular planet. The sickness I felt at its loss has been healed by helping clean and cook up a better future.